faust arp

How much information is too much information? In my absence I've been thinking of things to share on here, but, as you can see, I couldn't think of much. A lame rant about a school project doesn't really fill the void. Tonight, while chatting with Scholiast, I was able to clarify a few things. First off, I'm changing. Well, yeah, everyone is changing all the time, so that shouldn't be any different. However, in this case I think I'm changing into the sort of person I would never have thought I'd be 5 years ago.

reciprocity

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity."

circuit

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

the wings

I feel very different. I've tried over the past few days to form some sort of concrete thought to describe it. I've been unable to. The closest I can come is that the world feels very real to me... or maybe less real. And I feel as though I'm missing something. I don't know if it's something I ever had in the first place, or even if it is a thing at all.. maybe I'm missing memories, or the past in general? Or maybe I'm missing a future I haven't yet experienced? Either way, something seems off and I wish I knew what it was so I could start seeing what I could do to fix it.

god so loved

I don't know whether it was a dream or simply a period of imagining, but a few days ago I suddenly felt like what I'm going through is a stage that many other people experience. It seemed like the understanding of sexuality, the world, and spirituality is required to come to a crossroads in order for the individual to gain some sort of unfathomable knowledge of life... Like (speaking for males) my father, my uncles, their fathers, etc. have all experienced times of sexual confusion and same sex attraction, but mostly found that it was not their true nature to pursue any options that would correspond to being gay. Like it was a great examination where there is only one right answer, and that answer is God, and for them, that meant personal attractions did not matter... God and His plan were the only concepts of worth, and His plan, when investigated and fully understood, was man plus woman equals family equals the meaning of life.

sustainability

So I’ve been absent from the blog for a good number of days (as if you didn’t notice). Exams are almost finished, and the bulk of pre-Christmas obligations have passed. There were a number of thoughts that came to me during this time, but either I didn’t have time to write them down, or I didn’t have the energy to get more than a few sentences. I guess I’m generally feeling somewhat.. blah.

Enough of that, I’ll just write.

sweet seraphim

I want to write something even though I don’t feel like I have anything to write. It’s a problem I often have, especially when I feel like much of the writing I do put into this thing has a sort of depressed or lost tone to it (which does seem appropriate given the subject matter, but sometimes I and I’m sure you want a break). Unfortunately I don’t think that break will come today.

givingthanks

Today my family had our Thanksgiving dinner (comes on the 2nd monday of October in Canada -we invented it first). There were a number of firsts this year: First year with a nephew, first year with 2 married siblings, first year dad turned 60 (birthday today as well), and first year the topic of homosexuality dominated much of the conversation.